Bibliofreakblog

Ruby and the Stone Age Diet by Martin Millar

Ruby and the Stone Age Diet was one of Martin Millar’s first books.  It came out something like 20 years ago (indeed, a blurb from Neil Gaiman says that he’s been reading Millar for 20 years) in the U.K., but was only just published earlier this year in the U.S. by Soft Skull Press.

And I can see why nobody published it before.

This is the terribly funny Martin Millar being…not so funny.

The story is about two friends, Ruby, and her (male) bff, the narrator.

It mostly involves the narrator’s pining for his ex, Ruby’s refusal to wear shoes, the narrator’s search for a drummer for him band, and being dirt poor in 1980’s London.

And gods and goddesses.  Who might be real, or may be only in the narrator’s head.  This was the part that drew me in the most.  These are not necessarily your typical gods and goddesses.  For example, take the Goddess of the Electric Guitar, Helena:

The Goddesss of Electric Guitar Players is called Helena.  She looks after you when you are trying to learn a new song and if anyone throws a bottle at you when you are going onstange she reaches out a graceful hand and diverts it onto an amplifier.  also, if you have been assiduous in paying tribute to her, she will prevent your guitar strings from breaking and give you a gentle nudge if your solo is starting to bore everyone.  She brings comfort to everyone whose fingers are sore from trying to learn a new chord and, if the occasion merits it, she will personally get inside your fuzzbox and make it scream and shriek.

Meanwhile, it’s also interspersed with the terrible story that Ruby is writing about a werewolf.

While I think it’s a really excellent premise for a book–a sort of Seinfeld meets Rent meets Don Quixote–it’s execution is painstakingly slow to read.  And it’s a short book!  Only 152 pages!

It’s like Millar is trying to write in a slow, meandering, plain way to reflect the poor artistic ability of his characters.  But guess what?  Bad writing is just bad writing, and doesn’t add much to the atmosphere of the story at all.
Buy Ruby and the Stone Age Diet on Amazon

If you like this book/author, you might like:

(my reviews in blue)

American Gods by Neil Gaiman
Gods Behaving Badly by Marie Phillips
Olympic Games by Leslie What
Deus Ex Machina: a Divine Comedy by Marie Aragon
Don Quixote by Miguel Cervantes
The Lost Books of the Odyssey by Zachary Mason
Eight Days of Luke by Diana Wynne Jones
Votan by John James
The Lightning Thief by Rick Riordan
The Sea of Monsters by Rick Riordan
The Titan’s Curse by Rick Riordan
The Battle of the Labyrinth by Rick Riordan
The Last Olympian by Rick Riordan
The Mask of Loki by Roger Zelazny
The Great Book of Amber: The Complete Amber Chronicles by Roger Zelazny
Deathbird Stories by Harlan Ellison

Other works by Martin Millar:

The Good Fairies of New York
Milk, Sulphate, and Alby Starvation
Love & Peace with Melody Paradise
Dreams of Sex and Stage Diving
Lonely Werewolf Girl
Curse of the Wolf Girl
Lux the Poet
Lux and Alby: Sign on and Save the Universe
Suzy, Led Zeppelin, and Me
The Collected Martin Millar

Under the name Martin Scott:

Thraxas
Thraxas and the Warrior Monks
Thraxas at the Races
Thraxas and the Elvish Isles
Thraxas and the Sorcerers
Thraxas and the Dance of Death
Thraxas at War
Thraxas Under Siege