29
Sep
2009
The Bookseller of Kabul by Åsne Seierstad
I have mixed feelings about this book. Mixed feelings about the way it was written and its content.
Norwegian journalist, Åsne Seierstad, lived with the Kahn family, who owned a small chain of book stores, in Kabul in 2002. As a more educated family, many of whom spoke English, the Kahns were not necessarily a typical Afghan family. But by the end of the book, one gets the impression that being liberal in post-Taliban Afghanistan isn’t really saying much.
Seierstad chronicles the lives of each of the many family members. Sultan, the head of the family, his two wives, his children, sisters, and mother. Because he is the oldest male in his family, he reigns supreme. He lords himself not only over the females in the family, but also his sons, brothers, and nephews.
Because the author is female, she had a lot of access to the lives of the women in the family. She herself dons the burqa, still popular after years of oppression, ironically most among younger women, and points out the good and bad aspects of its use. It’s kind of fun to be anonymous, but God, is it annoying to wear.
However, we only get her opinions in the book’s preface. After that she never mentions herself at all. It’s hard to know then, when she is witnessing things firsthand and when stories are recounted to her. For the most part, I assumed that it was firsthand–that she was sort of an anthropologist doing an ethnographic study–but sometimes she writes of events going on simultaneously that geography makes it impossible for her to experience. While it’s good that she doesn’t give her opinions outright, I suppose, this makes it hard to know what is hearsay.
At the end, basically nobody is happy. The government is bureaucratic, the men are misogynistic, the women are afraid and passive, and I don’t think anyone is happy.
BUT. And I do feel there is a big BUT here, I always have to wonder…and I’m not sure that I’ll articulate this well. It’s just that I feel that progress is slow. I don’t consider myself a feminist (though I give the caveat that I’ve never really had to be, being a millennial and all), though I’ve cringed or rolled my eyes during my fair share of dumb blond or barefoot and pregnant jokes. It seems to me, that equality didn’t come overnight. It’s probably still not here, as sexist (along with other “ist”) jokes still permeate our culture, right down through to elementary school playgrounds. But I’m digressing. What I mean to say is that Sultan might be typical of a liberal Afghanistani male. He might really want to Westernize his country. He might really want to see women go work. But not his women. What this got me thinking about, in a way, is the show Madmen. If you have been under a rock, and haven’t seen it, it’s about people at an ad agency in Manhattan in the early 1960’s. It seems that they suffer from the same sort of dichotomy of women’s roles (and this is, mostly, both male and female characters). Either you can work, or you can marry and have children. You can’t have both.
So. Pretend that this Sultan Kahn guy met Don Draper. Draper would probably think he was an ass, but they might end up having more in common than it seems.
I mean, if I were Sultan and my wife(s) waited on my every need, would I want them to go to work or make decisions for themselves or anything after decades of living like a king in my own home? Probably not. So before we go on judging other cultures, let’s look at a couple things.
1. Yes, pretty much every male in this book (and I don’t like to take one book to represent a whole culture, so we’ll stick with the people depicted here) is sexist. However. They all hate their lives because they have no control over their own destinies, except for Sultan. So, they do what many oppressed people have done–they form a pecking order.
2. Change comes slowly. Women in most Western countries have had the right to vote for less than a century. It is only in recent years that women can be both career-oriented and devoted mothers. Before we look down upon others, or get disgusted by their outlooks, let’s try not to be so ethnocentric–especially when we turn a blind eye to our own paths.
Well, here’s hoping things have changed in the seven years since this book came out.
Buy The Bookseller of Kabul on Amazon
If you like this book/author, you might like:
(my reviews in blue)
A Thousand Splendid Suns by Khaled Hosseini
The Kite Runer by Khaled Hosseini
Lipstick Jihad by Azadeh Moaveni
Three Cups of Tea by Greg Mortenson and David Oliver Relin
The Girls of Riyadh by Rajaa Alsanea
Winter in Kandahar by Steven E. Wilson
The Punishment of Virtue: Inside Afghanistan After the Taliban by Sarah Chayes
Kabul Beauty School: An American Woman Goes Behind the Veil by Deborah Rodriguez and Kristin Ohlson
The Reluctant Fundamentalist by Mohsin Hamid
The Sewing Circles of Herat : A Personal Voyage Through Afghanistan by Christina Lamb
Behind the Burqa: Our Life in Afghanistan and How We Escaped to Freedom by Sulima and Hala and Batya Swift Yasger
Secrets Behind the Burqa by Rosemary Sookhdeo
Other works by Åsne Seierstad:
With Their Backs to the World: Portraits from Serbia
A Hundred And One Days: A Baghdad Journal
The Angel of Grozny: Orphans of a Forgotten War
I have read A hundred and one days by the same author and loved it. One thing I can say about her is that she usually does not put her opinions forward. She writes what she hears or sees without actually thinking of how it might look like.
Also, whenever we hear about people who are less unfortunate than us, especially when it comes to womens rights, we judge. I remember feeling horrifed when I read A thousand Splendid Suns. It wasn’t necessarily looking down on the culture but portraying as it is.
The example you give
“if I were Sultan and my wife(s) waited on my every need, would I want them to go to work or make decisions for themselves or anything after decades of living like a king in my own home? Probably not. ”
Is perfect because you put yourself in his shoes and think. But then again if you put yourself in the shoes of the women who wait on him, it might be completely different.
I’m really not making any sense.
On a lighter note, I remember reading the guy in the book raised strong objections against the book and the author. He even filed a case or something
It seems that they suffer from the same sort of dichotomy of women’s roles (and this is, mostly, both male and female characters). Either you can work, or you can marry and have children. You can’t have both.
Sigh. Sadly this is true in so many parts of the world. Even in countries where there are no legal or social impediments, there IS social pressure. And in my country, for example, where machismo runs rampant, women are the only ones who are expected to look after the kids, do ALL domestic chores, etc. Of course, they CAN work in addition to that, and many have to for economic reasons. The result, though, is a life of stress and misery.
Things like these are the reasons why I do consider myself a feminist
I agree with you that change comes slowly, though, and furthermore I think it has to come from within. Shiran Ebadi touches on that on the book I read about Iran recently: we can’t just have the West butt in and tell people how to behave. They have to come to it on their own terms.
I love the ability to chill while on the bus. I love reading, but it gives me a headache if I read on the bus. Problem solved!
I hated this book. Worst book I read in 2008. I felt like the author capitalized on western fears to make a best seller and get money for herself, exploiting a culture without really exploring it. Yes, there are bad things that happen in the middle east, but there are good things, too, and a lot of what she reported on in here are just seen in the wrong way. It really irritates me when people do this. My sister has lived in the middle east for years, and she’s married to a Palestinian. I’ve been over there and really enjoyed my time, and the people are not all like what is described here. It really frustrates me that the culture itself is displayed as inherently bad simply because it is different from ours. I wanted to throw this book across the room (but didn’t – library book). Anyway, that’s my opinion.
I have this book on my shelf but have not read it yet. I liked your review, comparing it to Mad Men. You are right that it has been a little less than a century ago that women had any rights at all and only in my lifetime have women been seen as capable of both careers and mothers here in the States. Americans especially are quick to judge especially, but change doesn’t happen overnight. We need to rejoice in the progress that we see towards gender equality and keep things respectful.